Thursday, December 26, 2013

Today's Office



Brought to you in part by,

"Masters Degree Preferred" - You need to go $75,000 into debt so our HR ditzes can more easily sort out resumes.  "Masters Degree Preferred" - the biggest, most expensive and unnecessary hoop we force our labor force to jump through.

Also by,

"Commutes" - We don't care if the technology allows for everybody to work from home.  We need to condition our labor force to obey.  Thank god for commutes.  "Commutes" - when you're a masochist control freak that hates your employees.

Also by,

"Layoffs" - Were you loyal to the company to the core and gave it your all?  Tough shit.  We found somebody who will do it for $1/hour cheaper.  "Layoffs" - reserved only for the most loyal and naive employees.

Also by,

"Divorce" - Make sure you get your spouse to divorce you as you spend more time at work than tending to your family.  "Divorce" - sponsored by the Corporate-America & Feminism Partnership.

4 comments:

Jones said...

And finally, introducing our biggest sponsor ...

"Consumerist Culture", the thing that makes you want to buy the things you can't afford with money you don't have.

leeholsen said...

i've had a view like that from my coach, breckenridge and lake tahoe while playing our companies little game.

before reading enjoy the decline, i also read your money or your life. seeing the economic demise that is coming, seems pointless to kill myself now that the days of job growth look over.

maybe if i can short the mkt enough, i can have a seat like that to enjoy the decline. my cigar of choice, siglo 6.

Sir_Chancealot said...

Captain, while I remain neutral in regards to your premise, I do not think it follows from the linked article.

People are protesting because of a tripling of a tax on a certain activity (i.e., that having to do with horses).

Our founding fathers were blowing people's heads off because of the modern equivalent of taxing a cup of coffee an additional 5 cents.

Regardless, keep up the good work. I like your articles.

Stretch said...


"Layoffs" - Why I always managed to "find" copies of keys to the loading dock/store room/server farm.
Nothing like swapping labels on shipments, parts bins, or tape reels. (Ya, I'm old.)